Pictured: a busy crowd of people on a street, blurring as they all go about their errands

Busy pretending to be normal

The last couple of days have been OH so busy. I’m holding up fairly well, considering. I drove to Dublin twice in the last two days and I’m going again tomorrow… and the next day.

Oh so busy!

I didn’t get to write on Sunday because I had double birthday festivities, which were both really lovely but definitely consumed a lot of my energy. Then yesterday was a day of errand-running. I had to go to the doctor to have him fill in a report which will allow me to apply for disability allowance (a very tearful, very emotionally draining appointment) and I had a bunch of minor ‘to do’s around Tallaght. The one thing I didn’t get to do, which I regret, is join my local library. I’m really trying to get back into reading but as I’m now temporarily sans-employment, the library is my best option.

Today was all about housework. There’s a lot to do because I’m going away with Cat and our beloved writer friend, Ben, for his thirtieth. So we have to get stuff in order here, both for our own benefit and also because my brother will be house-and-pet-sitting while we’re away. I’d rather not leave him in the chaos den that is the current state of our home.

Tomorrow, I have to pick up said brother from Dublin and also drop our dog to Cat’s parents. Plus, we’re only halfway through cleaning the entire house, so that’s the morning agenda. Then on Thursday, we cruise through Dublin again to get to the airport and make our way to London.

Busy busy busy

I’m holding up okay, considering, but I’m expecting to crash as soon as my adrenaline runs out. Also, I’ve been so busy I didn’t make time to eat dinner yet today. I know that’s bad and it’s no wonder I’m always in such a state, but I find it really though to just manage, y’know? Juggling everyday ‘to do’s with maintaining a human body is a lot of work. My puny human brain can’t compute it all.

At least I can feel good about everything I got done today. I know that’s something I need to overcome, the persistent need to ‘accomplish’, and I will. At some point. With professional help and more self-awareness than I currently possess.

Today’s emotional update may be a boring one, but at least I can go to bed without beating myself up. And I can get up tomorrow knowing my day will have purpose. Even if it will be another busy one.

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